FOR THE WEEK OF JULY 2, 2007
So, where to begin? My name is Ryan D., and I scare myself sometimes with the number of similarities I have with Mr. Monk. For starters there is our love for solving riddles. I simply cannot sleep until I've solved the one I am working on. This was so bad one time, that during finals week, I stayed up for more than two days working on a riddle that had been told me instead of studying for my tests. However, I figured it out, and just like Monk, I get that sneaky smile on my face when I know I've got it!
Nextly, there are my many obsessions. If I would like to pin up a poster to my wall, all the pins must be the same color, or I will not post up my poster. However, if they do meet this previous requirement, they must then all be equidistant from each corner of the poster when pinned to the wall. Moving right along, I also have an issue with my shoes needing to be equal pressure for both feet. If one shoe is tied tighter than the other, then I will retie them until they are equivalent.
I also connect to Monk in his inability to deal with odd numbers, such as when Captain Stottlemeyer spends the night at his place and sets the alarm clock for 7:53am. I connect with that so much that my 14-year old sister wrote a paper on how I can only eat an even number of Skittles at one time, so as to give each side of my mouth equal opportunity for flavor enjoyment.
I could go on forever, but my biggest quirk that I connect with Mr. Monk about is his deal with sneezing. I honestly freak out if somebody sneezes on me. One time, my best friend and I were on a road trip together, and I fell asleep in the passenger seat. My friend was driving, and "apparently" he had forgotten I was there and had to sneeze, so he turned his head towards me and sneezed. I instantly woke up (having felt the drops of saliva on my skin) and proceeded to wipe off my skin frantically and yell at my friend in anger.
This quirk has become such a large part of my life now that I actually have implemented a system to teach my friends how to sneeze properly. I tell them that simple redirection of your sneeze will not do, for saliva exits the mouth at nearly 100mph in a spray fashion, thus will most likely contaminate everything in the room. I also tell them not to use their hands because that is what you use to shake peoples' hands with. The solution is to use your inner elbow (where blood is drawn) for the sneeze will be contained, and there is the least likelihood of passing it on to another.
Well, now that you have gotten an idea of who I am, I will tell you my favorite thing Monk does. My favorite episode as got to be "Mr. Monk and the TV Star," partly because just like Monk I notice every little thing that doesn't match up in movies (including at least 8 I know of in this wonderful show), but even more because of how Monk always says "You'll thank me later." HAHAHA, I love that, and I totally connect with it! Even though people might not appreciate it at the time, I honestly think fixing it now will lead to some sort of future appreciation.
Anyways, that's why I think I should be Monk fan of the week. Thanks.
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